Trigger warning: At one point in this article, violence against queer people is reported.
Searching for clues during the shutdown
Even in a pandemic, it's all about perspective. Robi worked in Mexico City for several years, including on a project for street children. "When the shutdown came, I often thought about my friends there," he says. "Corona is hitting them even harder than us in Germany. Without enough money, you only get the most necessary medical help there, if any at all." But even in cities like Berlin, the anti-corona measures have "really taken their toll", says the 33-year-old. "The clubs are closed and many of my people are very worried about losing their jobs."
"The corona period was a turning point."
"I've got it good against that," admits Robi. He works in the social sector for an LGBTIQ organisation. "I have the privilege of not only having a secure income right now, but also having a bit more time for myself thanks to working from home. I was also able to tackle things that I had been putting off until then."
For Robi, the prescribed corona break was a turning point. A good year after coming out as intersex, he continued his intensive search for clues, requested medical documents from his maternity clinic and contacted the registry office that registered his birth.
As intersex born as a child, Robi underwent multiple operations without his consent. He wanted his body to conform to what society and medicine considered to be "male". "I used to suppress a lot of that," says Robi, "it was a big thing to realise that and discover that I was intersex."
Queer means: the right to be different!
Friends and acquaintances who are just as unwilling to be forced into the rigid male-female mould have helped him a lot in his coming out. Robi has received a lot of solidarity and found allies in Berlin's gay and trans* communities. Although the experiences of inter* and trans* people are very different, there are many overlaps, he explains: the diverse physicalities, the gender-changing operations. "For me, however, the operations were forced interventions during my childhood, which meant a violation of my physical integrity and my gender self-determination. I did not decide on these medical interventions for myself".
Trans* and inter* have "much more in common" than differences.
Despite these differences to trans*: There are many more similarities! Robi is convinced of this. That's why the Potsdam native also supports the campaign #WeForQueer from I KNOW WHAT I DO. "I am very grateful to the queer community because it criticises heteronormative society. For me, queer means the right not to be physically a man or a woman, but to be intersex."
"For me, solidarity means understanding what moves other people, looking for common ground - and then fighting together in our differences!" And that's why Robi is currently flying the rainbow flag particularly often, wearing a protective mask and keeping his distance, of course. In March and August, for example, he protested in front of the Polish Institute against the "LGBT-free zones" in our neighbouring country. At the end of June, he was at the "Black Lives Matter" demonstration in Berlin.
Stress test for our democracy
"Unfortunately, I didn't make it to the Slubice Frankfurt Pride," regrets Robi. [Slubice is the Polish neighbouring city of Frankfurt/Oder. In September 2020, a joint CSD demo took place in both cities for the first time. Editor's note.] But Robi makes it clear: "Unfortunately, trans*, inter* and homophobic attacks also happen in Berlin." He and his friend experienced this first-hand. In May, a man attacked her at the S-Bahn stationshouted: "You gay pig! Get out of Germany!". The man even jumped into the track bed to throw stones at the two of them. "We were physically unharmed, but it was a big shock." A railway employee helped them to flee from the perpetrator. "I've heard stupid comments before, but an attack like this is more blatant," emphasises Robi. "I have the feeling that our social climate is very tense at the moment. A level of hatred is becoming more visible in public that I - at least personally - have never experienced before." Since then, Robi has become increasingly concerned about our democratic institutions: "Corona is also a stress test for democracy, the rule of law and the protection of minorities."
Be critical, don't be unempathetic!
Robi does not see our state through rose-tinted spectacles. He finds it important to criticise social norms: "Being queer means questioning normative gender relations." Of course, this also includes viewing government measures with a critical eye - including the pandemic regulations. "On the other hand, I find it frightening that corona is being openly denied. Even a few people in the queer scene are doing that. I find that lacking in empathy!"
Robi tries to avoid infection with Covid-19 as much as possible. His friend is in the risk group. "If he or I got coronavirus, that would be stupid." Sometimes his friends are surprised when Robi would rather meet up outside than go to a café. He then patiently explains why he is cautious. "We have to have these discussions. That's also part of being queer: Standing up for your own attitudes and values. Of course it's difficult."
Demonstrate with masks and social distancing rules: E.g. on 26 October 2020 for Intersex Awareness Day!
And demos also work with masks and social distancing rules. The next one is already in Robi's diary: 26 October is Intersex Awareness Day, the world day of intersex people. "Last year, there was a demonstration in front of the Ministry of Health," Robi reports and laughs. "This year, I've registered a rally in front of the Bundestag from 3 p.m. and am currently organising the event in cooperation with TrIQ e.V. (to the Facebook event). It would be great if all our allies were there too!"
More information on Intersex Awareness Day on 26 October:
The queer scene is also affected by the Coronavirus pandemic affected, whether through possible loneliness or financial difficulties. Do you want to help or are you looking for help? #WeForQueer lists projects that offer help or are looking for support themselves. Click through and find a suitable aid or solidarity campaign!
