Who doesn't have this desire for the one true, great, eternal love? Because it is so rare to find in real life, it is conjured up all the more in novels and films, as in "Holding The Man". Some of these perfect lovers have already been taken to heart by entire generations.
The touching and humorous book "Holding The Man" by Australian actor Timothy Conigraves is also about such a couple. Since its first publication in Australia in 1995, it has gone through over a dozen editions, was even voted one of the "Top 100 favourite Australian books" and is now rightly included in the "Popular Penguin Books" paperback series - along with popular classics by Virginia Woolf, Jane Austen and Hermann Hesse.
The story of a great, special and unfortunately tragic love
What is special about Conigrave's book is that it is an autobiographical work and tells the story of the author's relationship with his partner John Caleo. This story of a great, special and unfortunately tragic love is not fictionalised.
While we are still waiting for a translation of the book in Germany, at least Neil Armfield's feature film is now being released in cinemas and on DVD.
A Catholic high school in Melbourne. As if it were the most natural thing in the world, Timothy (Ryan Corr) courts his new classmate John Caleo (played by Craig Stott). But in the mid-1970s, homosexuality is still a criminal offence in Australia, and gay teenagers can expect no understanding from their classmates or the school administration.
Charming and awkward approaches
However, the adversities that stand in the way of young happiness are not an issue at first, but instead: the first completely involuntary kiss at a party game, the charming and awkward advances, the first official date and secretly slipped love letters in class, for which the boys are then promptly summoned to the school priest.
But nobody can break them up, not even John's father (Anthony LaPaglia), who will lack understanding for his son's "aberration" until the end.
"Holding The Man" continues to follow the couple in their adult lives. John becomes a chiropractor, Timothy starts studying acting in Sydney and uses the physical separation to let off steam in the gay scene there. However, the real test for Timothy and John was yet to come. Both are diagnosed with "gay plague" and John falls ill with severe pneumonia caused by AIDS.
It's a bit strange. Because up to that point, the film "Holding The Man" is the story of a great love affair, well acted by respectable leading actors and with a surprising number of funny and some quite romantic scenes. But it's not necessarily all that impressive or heart-warming. We've already seen other coming-out and love stories between boys. However, in the face of the serious illness and the approaching farewell, the love between the two suddenly becomes tangible and gives them the strength to defiantly, even humorously, stand up to all the adversity.
A posthumous declaration of love
And when John's father dares to contest his son's will on his deathbed, so to speak, and to conceal his homosexuality, his true illness and his partner at the funeral, these two or three sentences are enough to make it impressively clear once again how fragile the supposed acceptance of gays and AIDS sufferers was, even within families.
Timothy Conigrave outlived his partner by two years. He used the time he had left to make a posthumous declaration of love: his book "Holding The Man". It became his legacy. He died just a few weeks after completing the manuscript. He did not live to see its publication and lasting success.
"Holding The Man". Australia 2015, directed by Neil Armfield, with Ryan Corr, Craig Stott, Kerry Fox, Camilla Ah Kin, Sarah Snook, Guy Pearce, Anthony LaPaglia, Geoffrey Rush. Cinema release: 2 June (OmU)
